Cure for Tantrums

 

My son has really bad tantrums.

 

He cries, he yells, he doesn't know what to do with himself. He doesn't want me to look at him, he doesn't want me to talk to him, but he doesn't want me to leave. I get down to his level and sit with him, but it can take a long time for him to calm down.

 

From what I've read, we are supposed to 'hug it out'. But to be honest, it just doesn't work for us right now. When I try to touch him, his tantrum escalates.

 

 If he is beyond it, he sometimes gets to a hyperventilating state and doesn't know how to calm himself down. What works for us is blowing bubbles! I let him blow bubbles, which encourage deep breathing, and he is able to calm down at least enough for us to communicate.

 

 

 

Anyone else have any tricks  up their sleves?

 

Emma

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Avoiding the Bedtime Battle

My oldest is a day away from being 2 years and 9 months, and a few days ago he decided he wasn't going to nap anymore. I had been dreading this moment for a while, but now it's here I couldn't be happier!

When Liam was napping, he went to bed anywhere from 9:30 to 10:30pm, depending on how well he slept during the day. Now he is going to bed at 7:30pm, sharp. When you don't have naps to set the precedent of how tired he/she will be, you can have a consistant bedtime. This is one thing I love because it means having time to myself in the evenings, and children really appreciate the consistancy.

Bedtime routines are a great way to give your child plenty of notice through non-verbal cues that bedtime is coming, and help them to relax and unwind. This is key for avoiding those bedtime battles. For us, our bedtime routine allows for some one on one time with myself and Liam, that he doesn't get a lot of due to his pesky little brother.

Routines can be formal or informal, they can include elabrate massages, or be as simple as reading a book. What's important is that they are consistant and they fit into your lifestyle.

This is our little routine:

We start our bedtime wind down immediately after dinner. First, about half hour of play time. Then a bath, if needed, and pjs. I let him choose one show (Team Umizoomi is what he's into right now) then we brush our teeth, read a book, have a little chat about our day and what tomorrow might bring, then bed.

One thing I find helpfull is to break our routine into steps, pairing something he doesn't like to do with a reward. 'It's time to put your pjs on and then you can watch a show', 'First we are going to brush our teeth, then we can read a book'. So far he has gone to bed everynight without any shinanigans.

Does anyone else have a bedtime routine? What's yours?

Emma

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Weight Watchers Take 3 .... starting tomorrow

Help!

I've been trying to lose weight while breastfeeding, and I'm having a really hard time getting started.

I'm doing weight watchers, and because I'm breastfeeding I get an extra 10 points a day. That's like an entire bonus meal! So why am I starving all the time?!

I also find that I'm eating too much in the evening, and not hungry for breakfast. Maybe this is because my body is telling me to fuel up for my son's night feedings?

I have been eating healthier for the most part, I just can't stop eating! I seriously eat more now than I did when I was pregnant!

Has anyone else encountered this issue while breastfeeding? Any snack ideas that will help me feel fuller longer?

Thanks!

Emma

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Homemade Musical Instruments In Motion

Last Wednesday we met up on a beautiful September morning for one of our playdates. I just wanted to share some photos (Photo credit goes to Nataliya) for those of you who were there, those of you that couldn't make it, and those of you who are thinking of joining our group.

 

During this playdate, our toddlers got to make rain sticks from filling paper towel rolls with rice, pasta and buttons, and of course decorating them.

 

It was nice to see everyone, and hope you all had fun!

 

 

 

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Celebrate our Differences

Ever get the feeling that as soon as you became a mother, every single decision you make is being watched?

Did you have a drink during pregnancy? How old were you when you had your first child? Did you have an epidural for delivery? Did you breastfeed or bottle feed? Did you make your own baby food or use store bought? What age did your child walk? Are you going back to work? Do you feed your child junk food? Is your child reading/writing/jumpingthroughhoops yet? blah blah blah.

All of a sudden every little decision you make matters, and you will get asked about your choices on a regular basis. Now, it's not your personality that makes you who you are, but your parenting choices. It's as though we think that everyone else knows exactly what they are doing. Ladies, I think each and every one of us is learning as we go here, and each and every one of us can learn something from each other.

Personally, I make my decisions day by day because, no, I don't really know what I'm doing. I never sat down and wrote down exactly what kind of parent I want to be, and even the vague ideas I had of what motherhood would be like changed very suddenly while facing reality. So yes, I do co-sleep with my 8 month old, some days we watch far too much tv, and I have on occasion given my toddler McDonald's. Does that make me a bad mother? I don't think so. But if that's not what you would choose for your child, that's fine too.

I don't make the choices I make because I think I know different or better than anyone else. I make these decisions because I do what works for me and my family, and I do what gets me through the day. I don't know everything, the things I do know were most likely learned the hard way, and I'm not perfect.

So why are we so nosy asking these types of questions to other moms? I'm sure we don't have the intentions of coming across judgemental. Maybe we ask these questions to find other moms with similar personalities and parenting styles, after all a lot of the times the only one thing that we all have in common is we have children close in age. I don't know if it's just me, but some days I feel like I'm being quizzed by other moms, and as if they are comparing my child to theirs. But at the same time, I do the exact same thing, ask other moms about their choices, because sometimes I feel like my kids are the only things I have to talk about. So I'm challenging myself to shift the focus from the children to the moms. Especially the new moms, because the mom world can be seriously intimidating.

We as moms should feel like our parenting choices are respected, even if they are different. We should be able to come to each other for advice without fear of judgement. We should be able to ask each other about our choices, but only to learn from each other and find support in each other's knowledge.

Came across this picture from Granola Babies that really sums it up:

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Right on Schedule

Freud was right about one thing, toddlers are anal control freaks! Well mine is anyway. Shortly after Liam turned two, it seems as though everything has become a battle of wills. I feel like I spend most of my time bargaining with a toddler! So I came up with a solution...

I made some activity cards on the computer, had them laminated and stuck magnets on the back. Each day I am going to put together our picture schedule to follow.

Our Day: Eat Breakfast, Get Dressed, Brush Teeth, Go in the Car, Go see friends, Nap Time, Wash Hands, Eat Lunch, Go to Library, Snack, Dust, Tidy Up, TV Time, Eat Dinner, Bath Time, Play Time, Pajamas, Brush Teeth, Read Books, Bed Time

When I introduced this to Liam, he absolutely loved it! He was so excited to have a visual plan of our day. He even showed his dad what we were going to do tomorrow. I'm really hoping this new visual schedule will make my life a little easier, after all, he can't talk back to the fridge.

I incorporated some simple chore activities that he can help me with, such as sweep floors and tidy up. I am also planning on leaving some blank spaces where Liam can chose from a few activities. Once each activity is completed, I will ask Liam to remove it from the schedule so he can easily see where we are at at any time. 

Other Activity Cards: Go see Family, Go to Doctors, Music Time, Go to Play Group, Go to the Farm, Fold Clothes, Go to Grocery Store, Craft Time, DVD Time, Go to the Store, Play Time, Sweep Floors, Go to the Park, Go to the Mall, Snack, Go for a Walk.

I used magnets because I had lots of space on my fridge, but this can easily be done with velcro and bristol board.

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Finding the Energy

I didn't get much sleep last night, I was up every 2 hours between both boys. The first thing I did this morning was make a coffee and make Liam breakfast. I had a mid morning coffee during our morning play date. When I went home I made Liam lunch and spent Liam's nap time cleaning. When he woke up I asked Liam if he wanted to go for a big walk. As soon as the words came out of my mouth I immediately regretted them. I was feeling the inevidable caffiene crash. There was no way I had the energy for a walk! My first thought was, I'll have another coffee and then go for a walk. I made myself another coffee and sat down. Then it hit me, I had not eaten other than a couple of scraps off Liam's plate (1/4 of a piece of toast and a slice of cucumber). No wonder I didn't want to go for a walk! I poured my coffee down the drain, gulped down a huge glass of water and made myself a spinach salad. Then voila, just like Popeye I was recharged and ready to go!

I've decided that I need to make a commitment to myself. So...

... I'm trading my coffee in for water,

...I'm trading simple sugars in for fruit and veggies, and

...I'm reconnecting with breakfast.

I need to eat for energy and let food be fuel for my body, instead of sugar and caffeine. I'm hoping these steps will help me feel energized, and maybe I'll lose a few pounds while I'm at it.

 

How do you eat for energy?

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DIY Canvas Photos

I know I said I'm not very crafty, but I saw this on Pinterest and I just had to try it!

So you know those really cool canvas photos you can buy that are really nice but also really expensive? Want to make them yourself?

Here's what you need:

- Paint Canvases from the dollar store ($1 to $2 each)
- Double sided tape
- Pictures
- Scissors

Before: I had these photos in cheap frames from Walmart. I felt like the frames really took away from the pictures, and they were plastic so they  don't hang well and kept falling off the wall.








Here's what to do:

- Tape the picture to the paint canvas
- Trim the edges with scissors

See what I mean .. too easy to resist!

After:  Now I love how these look on my wall, the canvas 'frames' really make the pictures pop. I think next time I will do this with 8x10pictures.

*You can also paint the sides of the canvas black

 Photos by ASH Images

I can't wait to do this again!!

Emma

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Top Teething Toys

How many of you have a 'Sophie Giraffe' teether for your little one? These teethers came out when Liam was little, and I didn't get what all the fuss was about. I bought one for Liam because, I hate to admit it, but because everyone else had one. Once he had it, I still didn't quite get what all the fuss was about. But at least when I heard 'Who's Sophie does this belong to?', I could look up.

I wanted to share my Top 3 Teethers:

1. Ringley Natural Teething Toys

This would be my alternate to the Sophie Giraffe because it is still a 'high end' teether, price ranging from $16 to $25. What I love about these toys is that Baby can chew on either the untreated maple ring or the organic cotton terrycloth. They also come in a variety of designs (seen here ). Oh, and they are Canadian! I have seen these sold at Nature's Emporium in Newmarket.

2. Nuby Bug A Loop Teether

This teether has been a favourite for both my boys. It retails    for around $5! My boys loved all the different textures and colours.
They say it's best for back teeth, but my boys have both loved this teether since their early teething days. Sold at Babies R Us.




3. Teething Bling

Yes this is teething jewelry! Necklaces and bangles you and your baby will love. I love my necklace because I can wear it anywhere, and if I don't have to remember to pack a teether. Necklaces sell for around $20 and gift sets including necklace and bangles sell for around $35. I have seen the necklaces at Once Upon a Child (new not used lol) and can also be purchased online on their website . These products make awesome baby shower gifts!


Are there any you would recommend?

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Just a little sleep deprived.

I haven't slept a full night in so long I think I'm starting to go loopy. How am I supposed to give my kids the best start in life if I don't have a good start to the day?

When people found out my kids were going to be 2 years apart, a common response was 'you're nuts!'. I'm beginning to think they may have been right.

The sad part is, my baby isn't the problem, it's my toddler! When we were planning our second pregnancy, Liam was just over 1 year old and sleeping through the night. We switched him to a twin bed at 1 1/2 so we could get the crib set up for the baby, and it took months before he got used to it. Just before the baby was born was when Liam started sleeping through the night again. We were so relieved, but then when Lucas was born, Liam started waking up again, out of curiosity and possible regression. Liam has been sleeping through the night for months, now he has just started to become a problem again. He is 2 1/2 now, and the dreams and nightmares have started. He was perfectly comfortable sleeping in the dark until recently, now he won't sleep without the door open and the hallway light on. He also has his last molar coming through which is affecting his sleep.

This is really taking a toll on my well being. Some nights both kids take turns waking me up, and I'm lucky to get a couple hours sleep. It doesn't help that my husband works nights so is not there to help me deal with this. He does let me sleep in on his days off which is really appreciated and necessary.

So my coping mechanisms are: 1. Coffee! I didn't even start drinking coffee until i had my 2nd baby. Now I wish breastfeeding would allow me more than 2 cups a day! 2. My parents. They have been an absolute godsend, taking Liam for sleepovers once a week. I am so lucky to have them.

If only I could afford to have my toddler in daycare, life would be bliss. That sounds awful doesn't it? Some days I just can't find the energy for him!

Mind over matter, right?

How do you find the energy for your kids?

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Crafts for the Not so Crafty Mom

First of all, I suck at crafts. I am not at all detail oriented and I hate mess. But my toddler loves to be creative, so I don't have a choice but to at least try for his sake.

I came up with some craft ideas which Liam loves!

And the best part is they are practically free!



1.  My Obot - Robot Mask

What you need:

-A Box
-Scissors
-Paint to decorate

Step 1 - Cut a hole in the box for the eyes
Step 2 - Paint the box a neutral colour
Step 3 - Go nuts with the decorations




2. I Spy Goggles

What you Need:

- 2 Empty Toilet Paper rolls
- A stapler
- Markers to Decorate

Step 1 - Staple 2 TP rolls together
Step 2 - Decorate





3.  Money Box

What you Need:

- Hot chocolate, coffee or nesquick/nestea tin
- Scissors
- Paper
- Tape
- Markers to Decorate

Step 1- Cut a coin slot in the lid
Step 2 - Wrap tin in paper and tape on
Step 3 - Decorate!




So much fun!

Emma

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The Maid needs a Maid

Come on into my house, take your socks off and leave them on the floor, leave your garbage and your change on the dining room table, just do it, everyone else does. Don't worry about it, the maid will get it. ... Well guess what, I am the maid!!

One thing I hate about being at home is all the work that comes with it. The more we are at home, the more mess piles up. The never ending dishes, the never ending laundry, the constant picking up of toys, it's all too much!

This is one of the reasons I cannot wait to get back to work. I know I can't escape housework forever, but at least if I'm not home, I don't have to see it. Also, my hubby has a 'since you're home, it's your responsibility' attitude, which I think is fair enough since he works an insane number of hours a week. When I am back to work, he will take on his share.

I did not realize how easy I had it when I was on mat leave with my first child. My apartment was always spotless, and I had all the time in the world to do what I want. In the early days, I would watch movies as my baby slept. Now, with my second, I have watched one full movie in the last 6 months. Usually I just give up watching half way though because I'm thinking of all the other productive things I could be doing.

In order to get anything done I have to either wait until both kids are sleeping (they almost NEVER sleep at the same time) or put on a whole charade to make cleaning fun.

And then my toddler tries to 'help'. As soon as I sweep the crumbs into a pile, he runs his broom over my pile sending the dirt everywhere! I wish I thought cleaning was as fun as my toddler did.


Anyway, as I am taking a break from cleaning, I thought I'd put together a few tips to make cleaning with a toddler a bit easier:

- I try to make a habit of having my toddler clean up after himself on a regular basis

- Get your child their own child size cleaning set, these usually include brooms and dustpans and such.
             Side note: For over a year I have been cursing toy companies for only making cleaning toys in pink. As if cleaning is associated only with girls! This made me so mad because I try to be gender neutral. I try to be so gender neutral that I would have bought him a pink set if my husband didn't roll his eyes at me. Anyway,I finally found cleaning sets in blue at Toys R Us and it made me happy. Yay Gender equality!

- When we want to do a 'deep clean' of all our toys, we set up a Car Wash (because most of my toddler's toys have wheels). He helps wash his toys. And it's fun for everyone!

- We use natural cleaning products so its ok for Liam to help with the dusting


I think the most important tip is don't over do it .. a happy you is more important than a clean house. And get outside! The more you are out the less mess you can make!

Do you have any tips to add?

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Meet the authors: Emma Mattin

My name is Emma and I am a mat leave mom of two beautiful boys. I'm racking my brain trying to think of what to tell you about myself. It brings me back to when I started my job almost 2 years ago, all of us newbies were asked to say something unique about ourselves. I felt like an absolute bore because I had nothing  interesting to say. I was not training for a marathon, nor was I an amateur astronomer like the others. I literally had nothing to say. I have no hobbies, my life revolves around my kids. I would love something to do besides change diapers and play trucks, but to be honest, even if I did have the time and the money for a hobby, I don't have a clue what I would be interested in doing. When I became a mom all of my wants got put on the top shelf, and now that shelf is so dusty I don't even know what's up there anymore. Maybe one day, when I have a little bit of time to myself, I can do some self exploration and figure out what I like to do.

I guess what I can tell you is that I studied psychology and rehabilitation in school. So I guess what that might tell you about me is that I am a bit of a nerd, and I am sometimes way too analytical for my own good. I enjoy reading, hiking, camping, and swimming. My style of parenting is very child-lead and I try to be pretty laid back. If I were to give a piece of advice to a first time mom it would be to relax and have fun!

The loves of my life are my my two sons Liam and Lucas. They are not only my sons but my suns, which my world revolves around. Liam is my oldest, he is two and a half. He is so full of energy it is unbelievable! Like most boys, he is obsessed with trucks and trains. My biggest challenge with Liam right now is curbing the whining. Lucas is 6 month old. He was such a pain in the ass when I was pregnant with him. The Dr's scared me to death telling me he may have to come out at 28 weeks, and worrying about his head developing the wrong way and his oxygen levels being too low. Despite the worry, he came out perfect and has been a really good baby so far. My one challenge with Lucas is that he will not will not will not take a bottle! He is a boob man to the core and I really would like to get back to work sometime soon.

Being a mom is said to be one of the most psychologically challenging experiences of a lifetime. I am writing to share my experiences through this journey in a completely honest way that hopefully people can relate to and also share some of my views which may be against the grain.

Please feel free to comment on any of my posts, I'd love to hear your views on the topics I post about.

Sincerely,

Emma

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